sUbcOnsCioUs sHock aBsOrBeR

tHE Fulfilling Life of a Christian Teacher

2010-10-05T18:20:00.001-07:00

It's been a long time since I updated my blog... I really missed it.. And it seems like i am a newbie in blog writing since I don't know how to start..weeeew...

For the past few months I am sooooo busy in teaching here in STI. This is one of the most fulfilling work that I have because it was God who gave this to me. It's my ministry..I remember four years ago, teaching is the last thing I wanna do although I have all the guts to speak in front..My friends will tell me "why don't you become a teacher?" ..and I will simply shrug off saying " I have the skills but I don't have the attitude".

And now, I find myself teaching in the four corners of the classroom, in front of about more than 20 students per section....It was God who gave this fulfilling ministry of mine where He allows me to grow not just as a professional but as His follower and servant...He made me fall in love with my job. And most of all, He made me fall in love with my students. Though I've been slaving myself for almost 48 hours a week, the rewards are incomparable.

I know the students are learning from me...But i was the most grateful teacher in the whole world because it was me who learned a lot from them... They are teaching me how to me more loving, patient, gracious, and kind... Teaching them reveals me who I am right now and they show me the weaknesses that I need to overcome. In spite of this, I know they love me. And i love them.

Though I am faraway from my church, I know that God is with me always to show me how should I love them.

A Night of Extravagant Worship Before Grand Concert

2009-09-24T17:56:00.000-07:00

I fell into Satan's trap just before I went to practice for a worship concert. I came to our practice with a very burden in my heart. I don't deserve Him. Remorse slowly hit me and I am so tired for being like this. I asked forgiveness but this guilt feeling won't go. I need His grace. I can't do this. I can't stand in His presence.

I sang three praises but felt that wasn't enough. Some of us were already committing mistakes when we already perfected it a couple of days ago. Am also tired and I know most of us have a lot of concerns to attend. But for the very last time, I want to give Him the best of my best and all the things that I haven't poured out before. I asked Him last night. Lord, please make me pleasing unto You, please make me do my very best unto You.

During the last practice, it seems amo not doing my best yet. But I did in my own strength. I seek Him and wait for Him earnestly. I am desperate that night to give Him the best and the highest praises and worship that I ever have to offer. I felt that God is looking down upon us. He is seeking and searching for His worshippers. God knows our hearts. We want to pour our hearts unto Him. God saw it. And He didn't failed us. On our last song All of My Days, we worship not only through our mouth but through our hearts. He didn't want us to stop..my knees became weak and I fell into the floor..i felt to weak of His presence but all I want at that moment is to obey Him, please Him, and be consumed with His Holy Spirit.

The music is unstoppable and Sally is exhorting non-stop. And she fell in the floor. I grab again the phone and shout His praise non-stop. I went ballistic. My flesh is crying out of praise for Him. My being was so consumed of His grace, of His love, of His presence. I want to consume all of Him. We want to give Him praise and worship until our last energy because He deserves the best.The people in church vow down unto Him.. We felt His presence and we hear angels and trumpets. We're on the mountain but He is just near us among the the thousands of unseen worshipers and saints.

We know it's just an appetizer. God will do more on concert. And it was an unforgettable experience for the group.

A Privilege to Glorify God in a Worship Concert

2009-09-07T21:49:00.000-07:00

It's September now!!Few weeks from now we will celebrating the glory of God through a worship concert on September 27, 2009 at Albay Astrodome..weeeee.... we felt humbled and we felt so privileged to be a part of this big worship team. We are composed of different churches united together to worship God in a big concert...

We started the practice last month and we are now moving on to the polishings... The music team of Jesus Our Discipler church was honored to be a part of this big celebration in the kingdom of God...We had a good fellowship from different churches. They are humble and more dedicated to serve the Lord. We know deep in our hearts that we are united together in the name of the Lord to glorify Him, not to compete but to complete. We are here to empower and strengthen one another, not to showcase and boast off our skills and talents.

joseph n buddy on guitars..joseph in base, buddy in lead

a beautiful pastor's daughter, jane on rhythm guitar

cool jorem on drums..obvious b?hehe

a worshiper, guitarist, drummer, our music coordinator, Lanie on keyboard

the worship leader sally and back-up singers ryan & mae

mae, ariel, and me on back-ups

the worship leaders ariel, ryan, mae, and me

the Group 2 Daraga Worship Team with the tambourine dancers

We are now ready to give glory to God on a night of concert. This is the team effort with the guidance of the Lord. There are billions of worshipers accroos the globe but we are few to be chosen to do a Godly task on earth. All the glory goes to Jesus for ever and ever!!!!Hallelujah!!!

Congratulations to Our Brother Soldier

2009-08-30T00:27:00.000-07:00

Finally!!! After six months of hardships on a training camp, he is now a soldier! He's a soldier of God and God has give him more challeging task, a soldier of men.I witnessed his graduation... I'm happy for him that his dreams came true..But it's just the beginning....

I wanna thank him personally for being my inspiration in terms of faith... He's the one who taught me how to be strong and hold on to my faith. He pulls me up when I'm about to give up...Though he's far away, he always check my spiritual health.

solo pic nia....

me & bro..

wow ang serious ng katabi ko

me & bro..his cap is removed...finally nakipagsabayan n s kin mgpacute s cam..hehe

Congrats Bro!!I'm just hoping that you will always put Christ first. Serve Him with all your heart and he will arm you with inexhaustible strength coming from him. He'll be back after a month and I hope to see him again.

SLTCFI Team Building

2009-07-29T01:34:00.000-07:00

Finally, after a long wait, here we are at Mullner's Beach Resort in Bacacay Albay...
We did have fun and we maximize everything we got here: foods, foods, foods, lots of foods pa hehehee!!!its like a feast! videoke...i sang once... the great view, the sea, games, bonding moments, recreation..... and guess what we really enjoyed!!!
do you need proofs???

here we go!!!

our first meal-snacks pa lang yan...

mga hampas tubig!.. galing pa lang s dagat ligo nmn s gripo..weee

mga hampas tubig tlaga!he4! nagkakasya para s isang baldeng tubig..hay nakow..

mga girls daw ni sir john...hehe..jenny, goldy, halley, me, & angie..o san k p?!

start ng TEAM BUILDING s umaga

the puyaters...wooohooo!!!d talunan group n kasali aq dyan..oks lng kc may premyo nmn kmi s SEO QUIZ

the group shot of SEOs and all SL BPO Pips on the last day

group pics s seashore...pose p rin khit bagong gising..hehe

a Dream Ignited

2009-07-21T07:40:00.000-07:00

I never expected that I can make a literary entry on Eucreo... but something inside me that brought those words into pen and paper... Thanks to my friend who was able to critic my work. I remember way back in college, i always dreamed of becoming an author of a book... now i know the kind of topic that i want to pursue as a writer: a biblical perspective of emotional intelligence. sounds great! ei is one of my most favorite topic..this is college thesis..

it created a certain impact as it make me shift on a new personality...that was a couple of years ago..ouch!that old!

but now i was reconnected on those old dreams, on becoming an author of a book.. but lately i realized that I can try out creating short stories or fictions...not bad! my friend told me that the story that I first created was full of life, not boring... so I guess I have to continue this..im just praying that He will give the strength and wisdom...

what's with this Witwisit

2009-07-16T07:47:00.000-07:00

This guy has caught my attention...He's a singer and actor from Thailand. I just find him cute. I saw him act and sing on youtube when I watched his film For the Love of Siam...I bet this guy has a look-alike here and he seemed to remind me of him.I even spend my time finding pictures of him and I here's what I found:

...he's indeed a knockout on his elegant pinstripe suit..(every time I look at this pic can't help but stop breathing for a while...)

...one..two..three...pose...!!!i love it!

...his poster on his movie Love of Siam

...love that innocent natural look on his face...

...his innocent helpless look on a pinstripe suit...hmmm, he's unleashing his real male appeal when wears a traditionally classic outfit...

...he's indeed a real cutie without trying to compare with other thai actors on his age. mario maurer is also gorgeous in a different way..

Mario Maurer: for d Love of Siam

2009-07-14T08:30:00.000-07:00

This guy caught my attention because he is reminding me of someone. And I got so curious that I even save some of his cutie and gorgeous pic that will remind me of him..

He is Mario Maurer, a supermodel and now a successful actor of Thailand. He's considered as one of the most beautiful man, a real heartthrob of Asia, and one of the most successful Thai actor. wow!

Hmmmm, he's good looking alright..but am not really head over heals infatuated with him.had to admit that i love his face and the way he carry dress..

...he looked sophisticated and gorgeous here....

....the proof of his supermodel career..reAL hot and overflowing with appeal..i just love the way he looks here...

...nothing is even more gorgeous with his military outfit..but he carries it for fashion..hmmmm...he just failed to make it look like he's a real military man though..

...a combination of intelligence and good looks....

...the Love of Siam Movie Poster...

He had other good looking pics but these pictures are so far the best for me. i'm sorry if i don't include the topless one...hahaha...

my li'l cutie Micah

2009-07-09T12:02:00.000-07:00

my adorable Micah..he's soooooo cutie aight???

I bought this cutie military bear in Manila to give it to someone.. But the problem is, I became attached to him...huhuhu!!!! My lovely MicAH... This is my first time to write about a thing..my stuff... last march, i created a story Courage for Micah. and I adopted the character of Micah from someone i knew...sshhhhhhhh.... that's our secret!

Well I guess its too obvious.. you know exactly whom Micah belongs... i love him and he always put a little joy in my heart...

Diligence Inspite Injustice (wooow 2 d highest level!)

2009-07-09T08:07:00.000-07:00

Sa kasamaang palad, hindi p rin kami sumasahod....well,....hindi ko n alam ang gagawin ko..ala ring silbi kung magalit ako. ala rin akong mpapala...

Ayoko sanang magwork subalit kinokonsensia ako...naririto ako hindi para pagsilbihan ang walang kwentang kumpanyang pinapasukan ko kundi para pagsilbihan ang aking Amang nasa langit... Ako'y muling dumadaan s apoy....

Ilang buwan na kaming hindi sumasahod sa oras para sa kakarampot naming sweldo. Pero hindi ko p rin maiwasang mainis...at magalit...subalit sabi ni Holy Spirit, hindi yun ang dapat kong maging attitude. Hindi naman Siya namimilit pero ako naman malalagot pag nag disobey ako. Ako ay narito para sa Panginoon. Kung ano man ang pangangailangan ko ay Siyang tumutugon. Grabe, malapit n ko mawalan ng money pero always 2d rescue ang akong Amang nasa langit.

Kailangan ko ng malaking malaking pasensia, endurance, and diligence sa trabaho ko. Ito ay para sa aking Panginoon at hindi para sa kliyente o kaya naman ay sa kompanyang pinapasukan ko. Alam ko na ang Ama ang may kontrol ng lahat. Alam ko makikita kong kikilos Siya sa amin at gagawa ng paraan s problemang hinaharap namin.

Sobrang naiinspayr ako sa debosyonal na natatanggap ko s email ki kuya Joel Osteen. Kahit anong sitwasyon ko, ako'y patuloy na pinagpapala ng aking Ama. Let His gloriousness be magnified kahit na ano pang sitwasyon meron ako ngaun.

Sobrang injustice ang nangyayari sa aming kompanya..sobrang baba ng sweldo at lagi pang delayed ang sahod.pro imbes na magreklamo, dapat humingi ng tulong sa Amang nasa langit.

Kaya ang gagawin ko ay ang mgtrabaho ng maayos. Nakikinabang man ang kompnanya sa ginagawa ko kahit sila ay hindi, ang Ama naman ang aking napapapurihan....

Empowerment on Malolos

2009-07-06T07:17:00.000-07:00

I never expected that I am able to go to Malolos due to financial problems. But God provides even if you don't even mind going there. But here are some of the proofs...
we had fun, we were inspired by our fellow Christian there, and most of all, we were spiritually empowered by them....

...hmmmm, jdc malolos strike their best pose with ate marie..boys over flowers version????hehehe

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....finally, other pips from JDC Bicol arrived..siemps d sila papatalo..hehe..

....am a virus carrier of this pose...yikes!!!but nevertheless we're still cool no matter how crazy we are..lols!

...its obvious that we really had fun here..and we're uninhibited showing our playful side..hehe

...its bal and noel of jdc malolos music team..

It's worth all the time,money, and effort to go there...aside from spiritual blessings we receive, we had more fun and fellowship with them

THE JDC CRAZY POSE

2009-06-03T09:38:00.000-07:00

sa pagkakataong ito ay aking nabigyan ng pansin ang aking mga kapatid na sila pala talaga ay may totoong talento..isang talento na ibinigay lamang sa mga magaganda at gwapo..laki nga ng pagtataka ko kung bakit ito ay ipinagkaloob sa amin..ganyan talaga kabait si God..

o sia, sige, 1, 2, 3, say cheeeeeesssseeeeeeeeeeee..........!!!!

start muna tayo sa cast...

tan ta na nan tanan.....si budhex,..ang feeling gwapo s JDC..sige pagbigyan..sabi ni God love your neighbor eh..kayat s kanya din napunta ang feeling gwapo award... o wag munang kumontra kasi feeling lng nman..hehehe

sia si shie, ang may-ari ng cam namin..kya palgi siyang sariling sikap s pag posing..hehehe...tie sila ni dha sa sariling sikap award..hehe

isa din s kakuntsaba at kabaro ni budhex...so feeling gwapo din sia..nsa pics naman evidence d va?? halos lahat ng kuha namin sa cagsawa ay solo pic nia, and so the sariling sikap award goes to him...

ang mukhang pinakamabait sa lahat (ooowsss d nga??)..mukha lang ha...d halata na isa yan s mga promotor din..(sssshhhhh...d over pacute award goes to her..

ang aking anak..siemps nagmana s kin..mukha ding mabait at mahinhin...pro...hmmmmm..tingnan nio n nga lng s pics...hehehe

ehehehehe...siya ang pinaka mahiyain sa cam (as in!)...lahat ng pics namin ay kasali siya at nsa unahan pa... at sa kanya napunta ang posing of the year award...(walang kokontra!hehehe)

siemps ang aming momey...kasabwat namin yan at dyan kami nagmana....at lahat ng award ay nasa kanya dahil nga nagmana kmi s knya..naks!!

siempz...am not excempted...accountable ako sa knila bilang mastermind at promotor sa kanilang mga out-of-this world posing..lol!!

o sia sige ito na tlaga...one, two, three,..........rampa!!!..please welcome, the JDC cast....with their breathtaking pose....enjoy pipz!

sample pa lang yan...hehehe

ayan sige...sinira ang view ng magandang pool dahil s pambihirang posing nila...go bulane n momey!!!!hahaha....

ayan sige pa..pacute lng bulanetotooot!!siemps i commend momey for her dramatic kuno pose...momey wag mong isipin yun, love k nun..hehehe

ayan na!!!!the best tlga si budhexx...hehehe

hehehehe....i commend budhex and rai for d melodramatic pose..pero para yatang gusto kong matawa...hahahaha....luvu guys!

hehe..siemps d rin pahuhuli ang inyong lingkod..pro lam naman natin kung sino p rin ang d best..haha

wahuhuhuhu....d best p rin si budhex tlga..hahaha!!!

o gusto nio pa???meron pa no.....

please welcome ....the star circle quest batch 000000000000000000000....

feeling nila ay mga syokoy at syoke sila...pro nakalimutan nilang nasa pool sila..indi dagat..haaay!!..hehehe

sila ang second batch ng sea creatures na napunta sa pool..heto at nagkakalat...hay nakow!

hehehe...ala p ring kapaguran...sayang kasi ang film..it's good to be a model tlga...

d unbeatable pose!!!dito nio marerealize ang kanilang real identity...sssshhhhh..quiet lng...kakalabas lng nila ng mental..hehe joke!!

hehehehe..kala nio tapos na..heto pa!!!...hahaha...

ayan kanya-kanyang trip sana..pro since birds of d same feather s d best policy, nagkasundo p rin eventually sa isa p ring breathtaking n pose...hehe

nkakahawa ang tingin ni budhex sa itaas kayat ako'y napatingin din..hehe

siemps, two thumbs up sa ating awardee for her best pose...siemps i commend din d team effort..wahahahaha...

ganyan pag ayaw na sa cam...as in sawang sawa na...hehehe..

sino ang tatalo s pose ng posing of the year award???lol!!!

hope you enjoyed...siemps hindi mawawala ang kakosa nio...msyado lang kaming mahiyain s cam kya gnyan ang kinalabasan...hehe...ayan ang aming mga pangarap n nagkatotoo kahit papano..salamat s nokia ni chie at s effort ng group to give their best shot...

more on cagsawa swimming..chillax!!!

2009-06-03T08:42:00.000-07:00

We really had fun...we felt like a child again..and we're crazy as we think..lol!!

o 'san k p? ala p ring kapaguran sa pag pose...always on the mood na magpacute n cam..ahem!!

as usual laging nag-aagawan sa camera...hehehe

nice rhiz!!!ang cute ng posing talaga..hahaha

la lang..la na kasing maisip n pose kaya ang tongue-out na lang..haaay!!hirap talagang maging model..

narealize namin na we need to rest and enjoy fuds aside from swimming..hehehe

our appetizer pose..

yan sige pa..pose lng ng pose hanggang d nasisira ang cam ni shie...

playing on d pool..lugi ang mga matatangkad..hehehe

one last group pose after leaving d pool..naks!!ayaw tlgang paawat!

It's Time to Relax: Swimmming in Cagsawa

2009-06-03T08:03:00.000-07:00

After an exhausting weeks, it's time to have fun, relax, and enjoy the real meaning of life...of course souvenirs like pics is a must!!! Goodbye sickness!! gOODBye loneliness!!Goodbye frustrations...!!!

HELLO CAGSAWA!!!!

hehehe...d trying hard pose under the sun...

d peace pose...

d pa-epal pose

the trying hard pa-cute pose...

A TEST OF MY CHRISTIAN FAITH…BUT I STAND FIRM!!!!

2009-04-30T12:39:00.000-07:00

I was having a conversation with my old online friend. But it turned out to be a test of my Christian faith. Not really seeking a truth. He’s got point all right. I know he’s intelligent. But none of his argument will make me turn away from my Savior. This is faith. Not just belief. I can believe in Jesus Christ but have not faith in Him. Do you wanna know the reason for my faith? Do you wanna know why real Christians stand up for their faith for Jesus?

The answer was simple. JESUS IS REAL. HE IS ALIVE. AND AUTHENTIC CHRISTIANS E-X-P-E-R-I-E-N-C-E JESUS. And I myself can attest to that. He is saying that Bible doesn’t have the origin. I just don’t know if he’s really reading the real bible. Because I am experiencing JESUS through the Bible. Bible is alive because this is the masterpiece of a LIVING GOD!!!!!

I have to admit that I’m just a baby in faith. I may not be too knowledgeable about God. I am not a Bible expert nor quite familiar with all the verses. But I know who is Jesus as a personal Savior and a personal God. I may not be as intelligent like Pharisees when it comes to His word although I have to. But I know how I can introduce Jesus Christ through my personal experience.

Remember what Paul said in 1 Corinthians 13? No matter how excellent he is, but without love, HE IS NOTHING!!!! I choose love over intelligence. And I choose faith over logic if that’s what it takes to know God. I didn’t regret this. If I never give up my intelligence, until now, I’m still lost. I pity those people who admire too much their intelligence but look foolish in the eyes of God. They will never see the kingdom of God. For He hides the pearl from the "intelligent". If etheists, atheists, and other non-Christian religions cannot find Jesus, it is because they can never accept Jesus as their Savior. Well, what a pity for them for they don’t know the truth. It’s ok if I will look pathetic to those who don’t believe in Christ.

LOVE is What d World Needs

2009-04-27T08:19:00.000-07:00

You've got the car on your own, a big house, a promising career..it seems that all your dreams are just beyond your easy reach...but something is lacking...

Saint Paul said in 1Corinthians 13:

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

YES...NO MATTER HOW BEST YOU ARE AND SUCCESSFUL YOU CAN BE, BUT WITHOUT LOVE IN YOUR HEART, YOU ARE N-O-T-H-I-N-G...

That's the saddest part of life we had to admit. Even if you have all the wealth and riches in the world, at some point you will never be satisfied. Your end up empty inside...I was reading a small book from my Peruvian friend about LOVE... all about 1Corinthians 13, my favorite bible verse and my favorite quote about LOVE...

So what does Paul says about LOVE?

He said in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Am I patient??? Am I kind??? Am I not envious??? Am I not rude??? Am I self-seeking??? These are just a few tests of love... I realize how hard it is to love a person if I will diligently follow what Paul says... But I have to, and I can by the grace of God.

The greatest challenge for me is to be PATIENT...People who knew me well might agree that I am very impatient.. But God knows how much I'm asking for it..And I can say I'm far from being very very impatient. But hey!! It's not bad!! At least I'm seeing significant progress. And how can I be sooooo rude and stubborn when I'm not yet a Christian...huuuweeeew....I have lots to improve on this area but I know God is guiding me and giving me all the grace to be unrude most especially when my temperature starts to boil straight on my head...

LOVE... this is what the world needs... If only the world can understand what Paul means about LOVE...

Confessions of a Single Lady..sssshhhhh...

2009-04-21T14:03:00.000-07:00

It's been a year since my more than six years relationship has ended. And that was confirmed when I saw his friendster avatar a girl beside her. I'm happy he has found a woman who can really love him and fulfill his dreams that I can never accomplish for him. He's got a new life. And so am I...

In fact, I am very much happy with the kind of freedom I have. Freedom in soooo many things. Freedom from pains and headaches ( and I was spared from giving headaches too!!!lols!!) But this freedom I enjoyed much because I am more capable of serving God with all my heart. I don't need to inform somebody about my whereabouts and what I am going to do next, where I go, what I do, all about the things that I need to do when I have a boyfriend. (sigh)...but what a sigh of relief to be finally free of doing those things. I manage my own life without reporting it and informing all the stuffs I do to somebody (my family is an exemption of course)

It's good to be S-I-N-G-L-E!!!!! A lot of my friends who are in relationship wished that they are single. And how I love to tease them, love to make them envious about how I enjoy much being a single. hahahahahaha!!!!! But of course, I know that someday I will marry. This is not yet the right time. For the meantime, I will enjoy this freedom I have...

Aside from the freedom that you enjoy being a single, you have the freedom to expand your horizons when it comes to selection of boys..yeah!!, I MEAN IT!! B-O-Y-S!!! (just proving you am not kidding)... girls, don't settle for anything less!!! don't be desperate to find a cheapskate guy just because you think you're old or this will make you different from your friends. I remember the title of the book I came across when we went to PCBS,

"ITS BETTER TO BE SINGLE THAN TO BE MARRIED WITH AN UNSUITABLE PARTNER". Very true!!!!

hmmmmm, of course there are suitors around me...they are not too many...but I have a great trouble who will be a blessed guy capable of taming my heart... what are you going to do with a good-for-nothing bastard guy? do you still want him to court you...it's up to you..but me???naa-ahhh!!! a big NO-NO!!! what a waste of time for me...i have six suitors, hehe..i told you they are not many... but all of them are the boyfriend material...they are equally good looking, intelligent, professional, with great sense of humor, and they will make you feel you are loved...i can even select from any of them even I'm blind folded..lols!!! and the six became two...aaah good!!! because these two guys are good to be my husband...they are equally good looking as always...lol!!! intelligent, caring, and most of all, a very much passionate lover of Our Savior. which is my main criteria... and i need to choose one... hahahaha.... i will just allow my Heavenly Dad to choose for me..

hahaha..i don't know what will happen next..But i am greatly enjoying being single....See??? Variations keep you alive....lol!!!!

But this is the great freedom that I really much appreciated and value... More time and more concentration on my Savior Jesus Christ.. He had open so many opportunities for me to be closer to Him... He's the most beautiful thing that ever happened to me.. My past is ugly.. But I'm grateful for it because it leads me to where I am... to the loving presence of my sweet Jesus...

A New Perspective of My Ideal Man....(He's Real! Oh my goshhhh!!)

2009-04-21T07:26:00.000-07:00

When I was a kid, i was conditioned that prince charming is existing. He came in a dashing suit. He was perfect any girls dreams. He's good looking, rich, intelligent, and very caring...Until I grew up and asking, is there really a Mr. Right? Or a perfect guy perfect for every woman?

My experience had taught me that such man can never exist. Not even my ex boyfriends fit on the profile of Mr. Right. I wish he can be like that. But all the more it makes me darn frustrated and disappointed in the end, not wanting to pursue marriage anymore. If marriage will give me hell, i'd prefer to be single forever rather being with a pain-in-the-ass man for the rest of my life. Maybe I'll give it a shot. But I need to be careful.

My experience before made me think that it's just fine for me not to marry. And why not? I'm used to manage my own life...

Until God has sent me this man unexpectedly. I have my own requirements of my ideal man. Aside from his good character of course, is the way he makes me feel. If he can manage to get my attention the very first time I saw him. He's the kind of guy that will not make me want other men beside me. It's him whom I think 24/7 and he's making me melt like butter every time I think of him. In short, am looking for this kilig factor. Oh! There was a man who made me feel like this..And it fades away...
This emotion is dead a long time ago until a stranger from the internet managed to disrupt my system. I still remember some of my posts about him on this blog:

"There’s nothing wrong with Brendan..its my emotions, doin sumthing wrong with me..but how ironic it felt sooo d**** f***** good.!!! There sumthin wrong with mHe!! D**** you Brenddan!!but ur soooooo m****da********* yummy!! Ur simply irressistable..how I wish ur totally a mother******* SON*********** or a good-for-nothing crazy AS*****…not like this!!! Ur sooo sweet..ur soooo thoughtful.. so gentle..so devastatingly handsome, gorgeous, Hot and ohh darn sexy….i cant blame my fellow specie..you can really inspire such wanting…"

Well, I guess I just need to be thankful that im still a normal b****** who happens to feel this way..i felt this a long time ago..wen I was a teenager..i tot no man would ever manage to do what im feeling right now..i tot dis tickling emotions are dead, a long time ago…now I realize that I was wrong…"
(September 12, 2007) (by the way,please bear with my foul languages..am not a Christian yet that time)...

And how about this from the story I created:

"He’s still the same guy she used to know. Handsome as always… He never failed to make her heart melt like butter every time she sees him. He’s the kind of guy who makes her want to look at his face over and over again. He doesn’t know, but she just loves to look at his lovely sparkling eyes that speak innocence in spite of his blatant arrogance. He is strong and full of confidence for himself. There’s just one thing she hates about him—he can read what she feels and he really finds it pleasurable to tease her! Grrrr… ..oh my! Is she that obvious???"

Hahaha..I can't help but laugh. But I realize how childish my wishes are...

I realize that finding an ideal man is not all about feelings. Because I met this ideal man with the opposite feeling...

But this man is really different from all of them. I used to ignore him before. I consider him a friend. I really don't think about him. And most of all, I really don't take much time and effort to communicate with him.....But I tell you, he is the embodiment of my fantasy. I've seen my ideal man. The Mr. Right for me...
But how????????

Love is Powerful Enough to Change Us

2009-02-26T13:38:00.000-08:00

They say that when you’re in love with someone, your life will never be the same. Everything is bright. Everything that you’re doing has a direction. You’re life is full of meaning. And when the going gets tough, you still have the energy to keep pushing until you finally overcome. In spite of the storm, you will learn to smile and shove away the burdens just a thought of that special someone that keeps you alive inside. Oh, how romantic isn’t it? And most of all, you never thought that you will become a better person you never imagined you’re capable of becoming.

February is now approaching and I can feel the big L is in the air. I’m not really a sentimental type neither of person nor into those mushy stuffs. This ain’t my type of personality. But that doesn’t mean I’m stone-hearted, far from that! In spite of my dominance, I still can’t hide my tenderness. I can’t help but show my concern and my longing to be with a person. You know that you are really in love when you know you are willing to give everything that you have. You are willing to give up all the things that are not pleasant for your loved one. No matter how hard it is, you’re willing to take the risk and pay the price even if it’s causing you to die inside. You really can’t love without getting your clothes torn or your halo askew, but this big thing that keeps pumping on your blood, its all worth the effort!

When I fall in love, I gave up everything. Personal ambition, my selfish needs, my own gratification. I even give up the need to be independent and in-control of my life. I used to hate my old self that keeps on hunting me like a nightmare. It cuts my heart with double-edged knife every time I look at her.

But I don’t bother anymore because Someone is loving me more than I hate myself.

I can’t explain the mystery of love. All I know, it is powerful enough to change me and became a person I never thought I could be. It was Him. And He’s worth all my love that I have for Him.

farewell to my popsy

2008-08-20T03:49:00.000-07:00

It was a couple of weeks ago when the Beijing Olympics had started and officially opened. August 8, 2008.. This is now a historical date on the sports world. This is the most awaited and anticipated date for everyone who wanted to witness the olympics. I myself get excited too in spite that I am having an SEO training. But this date and event is surely unforgettable for me and my family not because of this event. This is the day when my father died.

It was August 8 2008 when my dad finally surrender his life to the Lord. It was painful...My dad is gone whom I used to call popsy. It's the only me who called him like that. Gone is the father that I used to know. My papa, my popsy, the man of my life is gone.. I am on the process of adjusting and accepting that he's with the Lord now.. I'm so sad.. all the memories are coming back from childhood until now. I'm his princess and he is the prince of my life. He's the reason why I stayed in Legaspi instead of giving myself a break with a promising job in Manila. I know it's just a piece of cake for me! But I reject the opportunity for him. I never regret it. It was worth it that I choose to spend my time with the last days of his life.

I will surely miss you popsy sooooooooo much... I love you my popsypops!! I know you know it.. But i know i can never replace the kind of love that you have for me. You reject the opportnuties abroad just to take good care of me. I know I'm d apple of your eye. I can never imagine the things you've done for me nor the things you sacrifice for me and for my brothers and sisters, but I thank the Lord for giving you to us. You're irreplaceable in our hearts.

My family and I are on the process of moving on... I still can't help myself to cry at night but I know that God is with me through every details of my pain. I know He's there, giving me comfort and the strength that I need. I thank God for He allow us to show to him how much we love him. I thank God for giving me a father like him. so caring and loving for me.. A father who loves to cook meal for me every time I take off to work.. A father who is sweet, funny, and thoughtful... Thank You Lord he is my dad.. I know that he is resting now and is happy now with the Lord...

who never get tired?????

2008-06-12T21:18:00.000-07:00

The past few months was too exhausting on me.. I badly need to work while my body and health is compromised.. I have to admit its my fault because I neglect my health.. I became exhausted, mu mind, my body, and my soul.. I really messed up! I made things worse and complicated... in short.. I AM TIRED....

but on the midst of my trouble, all of my exhaustion, i realize that there is Someone who never gets tired of caring and loving you... when we have problems, it's a blessing that you have frends who you can trust and lean.. It's comforting that there are people who you can show your weaker side.. but there is nothing more intimate than to share your deepest hurts and burdens to Someone who is much nearer than your friends... who loves you more than your frends can ever show you.. who loves you just the same even you neglect Him so many times...

He never gets tired... He's the only one who will never ever get tired of loving me in spite of my ugliness, weaknesses, failures, discouragement,....all of me... in the midst of my dark and lonely journey, He's there, pouring me with LOVE and COMFORT... I know that He's there to carry me when I need it... Jesus is the best friend I've ever had.. He's always there to lift me up, wipe away my tears, and carr the burdens I have.. When I get tired...I just remember that I have someone who never get tired of LOVING ME.. it's JESUS.....

conversation of a child and a Father

2008-05-11T18:18:00.000-07:00

This is my prayer for You my Father, Jesus, Oh Lord

Oh how I need You Lord

You are my Only HOPE

You’re my ONLY PLAN

So I will wait for You

To come and rescue me

Come and Give me Light

Where Am I goin Lord God, if I wake up this morning and You’re not by my side? The personal Father whom I know but knew me very well before I was conceived on my mother’s womb and exists here on earth

So I sing :

And I worship You Father of Light

Spirit of Truth

And I worship You

Jesus we call on You

You’re more than enough for me.. How happy I am to know that You’re everything to me but can give more than I need… The happiness that I felt can’t contain inside my heart..Please make my heart big..Expand it.. So I may know how to share it..to SHARE YOU to many people… I still keep on sinning, but You taught me to ask forgiveness.. You taught my that Your forgiveness is inexhaustible and unlimited… You’re not like us who get tire to pardon someone who keeps on hurting us over and over again… You taught me to be patient on myself with others just how You are patient with me..You taught me that every time I stumble, I must learn to stand up again, don’t look back, and keep goin, goin, goin,…life’s like that.. it isn’t easy as what I think

but as you go along with your journey, you will realize the value of life that I designed only for you… Come with me, and you will not regret a single day of your risks and sacrifices.. I teach you not only to overcome your temptations but I am also teaching you to have faith on Me. I will never let you go..I’m not asking you to be perfect overnight.. Just trust on Me my dear child..I am holding You in my arms now, there’s nothing more to fear… Enjoy the life that I gave you..there’s more to expect, there’s more to ask..All you need to do is to TRUST ME for I am always with you..

Your wonderful loving personal Father,

Jesus

You always make me cry my Father..I can’t say anything.. Thank YOU? Yeah Thank You but there’s more my heart can’t express… Thank You so muchhhh….. I love You Lord… Thank you so much… This is my prayer, in your Holy Son Jesus name, AMEN.

Purpose of everything----

2008-04-17T03:59:00.000-07:00

For those who believe in purpose, even the most nonsense and most absurd events are also the source of something good.. out of boredom and laziness and losing my intellectual stimulation to create good thoughts, i was able to create a prayer.. yeah.. my prayer didn't automatically produce quick solution but nevertheless, i think this prayer helps me a lot to finish my work amidst all consequences..jeeeeezzzz i have to!!!!

here is my prayer..it simply reveals that in everything you do, God is the only Way for whatever problems you are facing though He will not respond the way how this trouble be solved.

I can’t write Lord god. It is only You whom I think today. I don’t want to waste my time for unpleasant and unworthy thoughts. You have blessed me soooooooooo much.. I wanted to give it back to You.. I don’t know how I feel except of anxiousness.. Lord God I ask You to remove my unworthy thoughts. For I know it will later dictate my destiny. Lord God help me to focus on Your work. Yeah, with the help of technology I was able to spread Your love in different ways.. Help me Lord God to battle all this fear to serve You..Help me to focus on You alone and not on the works of evil. I let this be my prayer for this moment. I can’t produce a good article for my work. You told me to face and overcome my fear. I will overcome the fear of going to hell because I am Yours. Teach me Lord God to believe in myself as I firmly believe in You.. Teach me to fight.. Teach me to bring myself on truth for I trust no one but You alone… Father forgive me for I cannot help but cry for Your mercy.. Forgive me for being sooo weak to fight… Just give me strength Lord God.. I know You’re always there.. Let me remind Myself that You’re the provider of everything.. I doubt myself but help me overcome this.. This is my prayer in the Holy Name of Your Mighty Son Jesus, AMEN…

The fact that I was still able to post this entry is because I am done with mah work..jeezzz..thanks and i praise and glorify God for that...see? everything happens for a purpose..

OVERCOMING FEAR

2008-04-16T20:38:00.000-07:00

This is my theme of the month. Overcoming the things i feared. This is because it is like a self-imposed prison that limits your freedom from exhausting your life to the fullest. I am busy finishing my friggin backlogs but this is my way to release my stress. The past months we're not quite good for me. I have suffered crisis and numerous persecutions. But God is good! I know He never abandoned me. I know when I suffered, He knew everything how i felt. But now, God wants me to face my FEAR... This is the right time to do it. That's the significance of the book Destination Success i bought because of depression. The author talks about overcoming and facing fear.

"Overcoming your fear is the beginning of WISDOM"

This is the very first quote i remembered when he discussed about fear. The past few years I keep on running from them. But I realize how wrong I am. To overcome your fear, you must into them, not run away from them. You might say this is easier said than done. But with persistence and determination to overcome your shadow, you can. I experience a lot of struggles. I'm still on the process of overcoming my fear and this is not done overnight. It will need serious hard work. And if you cling to God, He will anchor you on your journey. I still stumble, but nevertheless I persevere.
Just like what David did to Goliath. He ran toward the fierce giant instead of running away from it. I guess all of us has Goliath in our hearts. What are they? If you know you fear something but don't know what it is, you're in deep trouble.

For me, overcoming fear is not the beginning of wisdom, but freedom..

the UnBEARABLE TRUTHS ABOUT HELL

2008-03-13T20:57:00.000-07:00

I spent almost two days of terror after I watched the documentary film entitled Hell is Real.. This is a three disc documentary film that revealed the thing "HELL" is really existing.. I only watched the last part for more than an hour.. I anticipated that watching this will not be easy for me.. I felt the burden of the pastor to share it with others..this is not going to be easy.. So am I. But i felt the big responsibility to share it with so many people.. And it is not easy for me to write it hir.. but it needs to be now...I will only share to you what I have learned and found out..
I really believe there is really hell, but the revealing truths were almost unimaginable for me..I never thought this kind of place really exists.. HELL is the place where souls are tortured..for eternity...you can imagine all the kinds of sufferings here on earth..now, multiply it by so many times, you can even use the 7 digit numbers, multiply it on its square root.. and that was HELL..

LAKES and WELLS of FIRE... 12 feet long WORM that NEVER DIES..these are the things that you can found in hell, endlessly torturing you in the most unimaginable and painful way..

now who are these people? don't even think that God wanted this to happen. He wanted all of us to be saved that's why He sent Jesus for us. Those people who don't simply ignore God.. Those people who have called million times but didn't even bothered to respond.. and they keep on saying, "I will serve you God, but not today..I will devote my time for you TOMORROW". What if this tomorrow never comes? No matter what we do, when we die, that was all useless..Who else? Those who never bothered to repent on their sins..Those who are happy and take mindless pleasures of committing sins over and over again.. Those who only live to satisfy themselves... Those who only devote their time in money making and never wanted to share it the less fortunate..

While you are still alive, there is hope.. This means that God is still giving us a chance to go back to Him, serve Him, and offer our life to Him... If we trust God, we don't need to be afraid.. This revelation is a clear message from God that He loves us so much and He wanted us to know the truth..
The message of Salvation through Jesus Christ is the truth.. Christ did his majo part. All we need to do is accept the fact the Jesus Christ is our Saviour and Redeemer. No one is destined to go to hell. If we are, then it's our choice!
Jesus loves us more than we ever imagined and ever needed. That is why He already paid the price for us. Faith in the name of Jesus Christ is the only way to salvation..If you still don't believe Him, the fact that you are still alive is a clear message that He is reaching out for you..

im sooo pissed off i found myself buying a good book!

2008-03-06T20:07:00.000-08:00

so many things have happened to me that past few days. so many tangled emotions that i tried to vanquish with so many alternatives that might later make me well... watching movie, writing a journal, listening to some blood pumping and hell-raising music, dancing, eating, and now, buying a good book..i don't know im sooo depressed and im such a real mess big time! well this book, the title was Destination Success by Dwight Bain.. This is one of my fave books way back in college..this is the only change i get to buy this book..out of depression.. i know there's something in it.. i can't produce good quality articles because I am soo distracted and disturbed... my life is at stake a couple of days ago.. i hope i will be safe now that i moved to another boarding house... i still have a friggin jetlag since i saw that thief sneaking on our room... good for me if i didn't have a clear image of that guy.. hmm, he's ugly...that enough to steal away my sweet sleep (goodness gracious!)..so before i found out myself cut into pieces, its better to move another safe place to find a home.. is this a part of adjustment? i've been living on my former boarding house for almost two years.. this was my first time to move out.. damn that monster bastard! well life's like that..
i was hoping that things will be better this week. i hope i can improve my work..and i hope that this book can help me..of course i gotta read this first. maybe this weekend...

self-sabotage ..is the worst part of me.. bad things can be good things... that's according to the book i just bought few minutes ago.. makes sense... but i need to go back to work now...

fasting continues

2008-02-22T02:28:00.000-08:00

well nothing much to say.. for the sake of putting an entry here.. its more than two since i started it..the first few days was soooo hard and difficult. i even experience dizziness, hungry and i felt week. but after few more days, not eating rice at night are no longer difficult.. im gradually losing weight.. but something is lacking..my relationship with God is not really progressing.. i need to work on it... my fasting is useless if I didn't renew my relationship with the Creator.. but everything I do, I dedicate it to him...i sometimes give myself chance to eat with what i really want..but more on less i can now discipline myself little by little..baby steps..slowly but surely..i need focus on Him, just like i am focusing on my weak points as a writer..thats what fasting is all about..

40 DAYS OF PRAYER AND FASTING

2008-02-07T17:36:00.000-08:00

So much has happened to me lately.. But the last thing that brings more significance to me is the fast approach of Lenten Season. When we go to church that was the homily was all about. Its time for fasting again.. I don’t normally do it except that I don’t eat meat during Friday and during the holy week.. Lenten season is very normal for me.. Nothing much happen spiritually.. Yeah I prayed but it was an obligation for me.

This time I am taking fasting seriously for spiritual purposes and to grow closer to God. I started it last Monday and this would be my fifth day.. I am fasting for rice, I only eat once a day. For people who may find that easy, you don’t normally call it fasting. Eating rice for me is a big deal because I can’t live without it. Even I am loaded with other foods my appetite to eat will not yet slow down until I eat rice. That is why I don’t normally take snacks, I can survive without it.. But without rice??? Naaaaaahhhhh!!!!! I can’t live without it.. I can survive without eating other foods but not rice for crying out loud!! This is very true when I say it!

But for God I will do this. Yesterday I felt to dizzy and felt sooo weak.. I take snacks but for the past few days I cut back my rice intake. Oh I remember! I even fast for coffee. I have a tumbler big enough to be a pitcher. My coffee intake goes more than one liter a day! (I hope I was exaggerating but I’m not!). Then I go for oatmeal during dinner time and that was very very difficult for me.. I still try to obey my hunger but I avoid trying to eat rice. During night time I felt hungry because I know oatmeal would not be enough for me…Not just that! My stomachs really aching.. Ouch!! But have to endure it!

I am still on the crucial adjustment period. But with God I know its gonna be worth it.. I don’t know.. I am true when I say that I am taking my relationship with God more seriously than before. That is why I take courage to do the fasting most specially on rice and coffee.. These are the two things I can’t live without..

Fasting can be done in so many ways. But first, begin it with the desire to grow closer to God and He will help you overcome the desires of your flesh. I am not in the authority to say this, only my experience can attest to that. Always ask assistance and guidance to Him. You know that everything is possible with Him.. And now, I am continuously praying for the courage to continue what I’ve started. For now I cannot tell the results but I know that God recognizes it.

iT FEELS GOOD TO BE YOUNG!!!!!!

2008-01-25T02:20:00.000-08:00

i'm always young at heart..but not what I used to think... my soul has been refreshed today in a different way..i don't know..maybe i am thinking too much of my age..they say that as you grow old, your energy is inclined to slow down...but ironically, this is not what happening to me... i don't know.. i was renewed and my soul has regained new energy... do you know how it feels go back on your age 10 years younger? i am still acting like a child but the feeling is quite different....wew!!! and what an energy!!! my age? oh!forget about it!! i doesn't show on my physical looks even the way i dress..haha!! i still look like a teenager... right now, i literally feel like a fourteen year old gurl about to bloom.. its because of the song performed by The Click Five. The title is "Time Machine" and the lyrics goes like this:

"Time Machine"

Oh what mess
you've got the best of my heart
It broke and now it's just a joke
Cause you're moving right along
I'm still here and you're gone
Oh what shame
You know I didnt mean for the winds to change
Won't ever be the same
Cause the kisses that you blew
Could never ever move

Chorus:

I think I need some time by myself

Without anybody else

I just need to unwind

In my time machine

I need to go far away

A few years back would be ok

I just need to unwind

In my time machine

Hey you
Ya i'm talking to you
You lost the love in bed
And now it's just dead
Cause it didn't mean a thing
Waiting for a ring
Hey it's a game
And ain't it a shame that it's just a show
I thought that this was love
But I can't be fooled again
I'm cryin' out
But I can't give in
All the things that we could change
(things that we could change)
Now we'll never be the same
By Myself
I don't need anybody else
I just need to unwind
In my time machine
In my time machine

hahahaha!!i can't help but laugh my ass off!! how this song can significantly feel this way!!i really feel like moving freely and dance stangely as long as i want..inside our hearts are souls with deep desires to be a child again because we are tired to think about the harsh of life can offer...i realized that sometimes, for a while, i need to give up being a grown up mature person and move wildly..breathing the life,,,taking the advantage of this exhaustible strength the force of the life can provide...
i don't know if i am undergoing the process of regression..14 years old..10 years ago..that was indeed a sign of regression..lol!!but it feels good to be one..to go back on my teenage self..just happy and uninhibited...full of vibrant energy...
sometimes, i wanna take plunge..give up the authourity and privilege that i am taking charge and take full responsibility of my life...
sometimes, i wanna forget how far iv'e grown..what are the thing i already achieved..just wanna be a teenager, a little child once again...
it feels good...to bring back the kind of stength thta you have when you were on your younger years..it feels good to feel like a little gurl by heart...by soul..my sould is regaining that kind on stength..its soo strange but its happening.....
i know the reason behind this and i wanna thank Him for making me feel this way..i will never forget this wonderful gift, this mysterious miracle...

nOthing mUch exCepT.............

2008-01-24T01:57:00.000-08:00

Hmmm..i miss blogging lately..but not really writing because I am so busy with other stuffs..nothing much new to me except of my new haircut..im still d same old sassy fun to be with crazy smart ass gal who have ups and downs.. the past few days are filled with excitement and adventure...yeah i still feel depression but not much as compared with the past few months..i am in love..not with some dorks that you're thinking.. i am in love with the kind of life im living though sometimes i feel depressed, downhearted, and sometimes, empty..but nevertheless i bounce back from normal, being simply contented with the kind of life i have.. i am generally happy and contented as my spirituality keeps on growing..hmmm..whats my new stuff?

nothing much..my fondness on emo songs are strongly increasing..but i also felt an addiction towards rock christian music...thanks to my workmate hir and brother...my playlist is filled with christian music....

and my new outfit???!!lol!! only for this day i think.. but i promised it to myself.. i wanna give myself a try..but im still thinking about since i am not that comfortable.. but nevertheless i am happy with these "changes"..lol!!!

i keep on learning..i still love life though im a bit disturbed that is why I am playing emo songs on my media player to scream for me...grrrr.. i am pissed the past few days because of a good-for-nothing son-of-a-bitch asshole..but hell!!! i would say that i could kiss my ass for saying he's still the luckiest bastard on this side of the planet..d irony but the cold truth stabs like a double edge knife on me...

yeah!a bastard..sonofabitch..asshole..lucky piece of shit!!..but he is still lucky...well well well...
i don't give a damn... how come the insignificant creature will have a place on this blog? naaahhh!!!well, at least i am giving a space for myself to be completely stupid and dumb-sucking idiot..

wew....well..life must go on...i don't know if i hate him until now..i just want him to get rid out of my system royally...i know it has a purpose..(like this fucking entry!!) ..i just dnt know yet..wow!!exercising the power to choose and positive perspective..i am in charge of my life..i thank my Mighty Creator for being there for me.. oweiz..for loving the hell out of me..

but generally I am happy w my life..problem? naahh!!it shouldn't stop me from enjoying my meaningful life..problem is a part of it and im embracing my troubles with arms wide open..under the sunlight..welcome to my life!!(hahahaha3!!) now thats life!!we have problems but we just have to shrug them off..deal with the constructively and creatively.... you need it to make you a better person...sometimes it feels good to be an idiot..when you remember them, you can simply laugh them off and feel good about it later...

they may say life sucks!but who cares??life is life.. im living it..savoring every moment of my existence..lol!!just enjoy..take a plunge while you have the chances to breathe...

COGNITIVE ERRORS AND POSTIVE ATTITUDE

2008-01-15T17:31:00.000-08:00

I’m on the mood to write since yesterday. I’m glad I am bringing back my concentration after few months of destruction. I have to admit that I’m occasionally depressed but I am cleverer to handle it. My roommate is right al along when she told me that you are the ones making yourself miserable. Yeah I completely agree with her. It’s what we call cognitive errors in psychology. And I was listening in ok fm awhile ago before hauling my ass on the work.

Few of them reminds me about having the positive perspective in ramdom order.

When you are broken-hearted, this means that you can love selflessly

When you pay taxes, this means you are unemployed

When your house is dirty after the party, this means that you have friends to celebrate

When you receive many txt messages, this means that you are well-remembered

I guess the positive attitude has deepest impact for me. I am in control of my life. I should not depend myself to anybody when I can choose how will I respond to a situation. Well this doesn’t necessarily mean that I am exempted from having emotional disequilibrium. Wow! Psyche jargons again! lol! Yeah I am still vulnerable from pain but it’s all up to me if I will dwell on my adversaries deeply. Sometimes it’s me who really hurt me and not anyone. Although some people intentionally hurt other people. How? I’ve listed some of the cognitive errors I search in wikipedia: They are causing toxic personality that might be detrimental on our personality disposition.

Decision-making and behavioral biases

Many of these biases are studied for how they affect belief formation and business decisions and scientific research.

* Bandwagon effect — the tendency to do (or believe) things because many other people do (or believe) the same. Related to groupthink, herd behaviour, and manias.

* Base rate fallacy — ignoring available statistical data in favor of particulars

* Bias blind spot — the tendency not to compensate for one's own cognitive biases.

* Choice-supportive bias — the tendency to remember one's choices as better than they actually were.

* Confirmation bias — the tendency to search for or interpret information in a way that confirms one's preconceptions.

* Congruence bias — the tendency to test hypotheses exclusively through direct testing, in contrast to tests of possible alternative hypotheses.

* Contrast effect — the enhancement or diminishment of a weight or other measurement when compared with recently observed contrasting object.

* Déformation professionnelle — the tendency to look at things according to the conventions of one's own profession, forgetting any broader point of view.

* Distinction bias - the tendency to view two options as more dissimilar when evaluating them simultaneously than when evaluating them separately.[1]

* Endowment effect — "the fact that people often demand much more to give up an object than they would be willing to pay to acquire it".[2]

* Extreme aversion — the tendency to avoid extremes, being more likely to choose an option if it is the intermediate choice.

* Focusing effect — prediction bias occurring when people place too much importance on one aspect of an event; causes error in accurately predicting the utility of a future outcome.

* Framing — by using a too narrow approach or description of the situation or issue. Also framing effect — drawing different conclusions based on how data are presented.

* Hyperbolic discounting — the tendency for people to have a stronger preference for more immediate payoffs relative to later payoffs, the closer to the present both payoffs are.

* Illusion of control — the tendency for human beings to believe they can control or at least influence outcomes that they clearly cannot.

* Impact bias — the tendency for people to overestimate the length or the intensity of the impact of future feeling states.

* Information bias — the tendency to seek information even when it cannot affect action.

* Irrational escalation — the tendency to make irrational decisions based upon rational decisions in the past or to justify actions already taken.

* Loss aversion — "the disutility of giving up an object is greater than the utility associated with acquiring it".[3] (see also sunk cost effects and Endowment effect).

* Mere exposure effect — the tendency for people to express undue liking for things merely because they are familiar with them.

* Moral credential effect — the tendency of a track record of non-prejudice to increase subsequent prejudice.

* Need for closure — the need to reach a verdict in important matters; to have an answer and to escape the feeling of doubt and uncertainty. The personal context (time or social pressure) might increase this bias.[4]

* Neglect of probability — the tendency to completely disregard probability when making a decision under uncertainty.

* Omission bias — The tendency to judge harmful actions as worse, or less moral, than equally harmful omissions (inactions).

* Outcome bias — the tendency to judge a decision by its eventual outcome instead of based on the quality of the decision at the time it was made.

* Planning fallacy — the tendency to underestimate task-completion times.

* Post-purchase rationalization — the tendency to persuade oneself through rational argument that a purchase was a good value.

* Pseudocertainty effect — the tendency to make risk-averse choices if the expected outcome is positive, but make risk-seeking choices to avoid negative outcomes.

* Reactance — the urge to do the opposite of what someone wants you to do out of a need to resist a perceived attempt to constrain your freedom of choice.

* Selective perception — the tendency for expectations to affect perception.

* Status quo bias — the tendency for people to like things to stay relatively the same (see also Loss aversion and Endowment effect).[5]

* Unit bias — the tendency to want to finish a given unit of a task or an item with strong effects on the consumption of food in particular

* Von Restorff effect — the tendency for an item that "stands out like a sore thumb" to be more likely to be remembered than other items.

* Zero-risk bias — preference for reducing a small risk to zero over a greater reduction in a larger risk.

Biases in probability and belief

Many of these biases are often studied for how they affect business and economic decisions and how they affect experimental research.

* Ambiguity effect — the avoidance of options for which missing information makes the probability seem "unknown".

* Anchoring — the tendency to rely too heavily, or "anchor," on a past reference or on one trait or piece of information when making decisions.

* Attentional bias — neglect of relevant data when making judgments of a correlation or association.

* Availability heuristic — estimating what is more likely by what is more available in memory, which is biased toward vivid, unusual, or emotionally charged examples.

* Availability cascade - a self-reinforcing process in which a collective belief gains more and more plausibility through its increasing repetition in public discourse (or "repeat something long enough and it will become true").

* Clustering illusion — the tendency to see patterns where actually none exist.

* Conjunction fallacy — the tendency to assume that specific conditions are more probable than general ones.

* Gambler's fallacy — the tendency to assume that individual random events are influenced by previous random events. For example, "I've flipped heads with this coin five times consecutively, so the chance of tails coming out on the sixth flip is much greater than heads."

* Hawthorne effect — refers to a phenomenon which is thought to occur when people observed during a research study temporarily change their behavior or performance (this can also be referred to as demand characteristics).

* Hindsight bias — sometimes called the "I-knew-it-all-along" effect, the inclination to see past events as being predictable.

* Illusory correlation — beliefs that inaccurately suppose a relationship between a certain type of action and an effect.

* Ludic fallacy — the analysis of chance related problems with the narrow frame of games. Ignoring the complexity of reality, and the non-gaussian distribution of many things.

* Neglect of prior base rates effect — the tendency to neglect known odds when reevaluating odds in light of weak evidence.

* Observer-expectancy effect — when a researcher expects a given result and therefore unconsciously manipulates an experiment or misinterprets data in order to find it (see also subject-expectancy effect).

* Optimism bias — the systematic tendency to be over-optimistic about the outcome of planned actions.

* Overconfidence effect — the tendency to overestimate one's own abilities.

* Positive outcome bias — a tendency in prediction to overestimate the probability of good things happening to them (see also wishful thinking, optimism bias and valence effect).

* Primacy effect — the tendency to weigh initial events more than subsequent events.

* Recency effect — the tendency to weigh recent events more than earlier events (see also peak-end rule).

* Regression toward the mean disregarded — the tendency to expect extreme performance to continue.

* Reminiscence bump — the effect that people tend to recall more personal events from adolescence and early adulthood than from other lifetime periods.

* Rosy retrospection — the tendency to rate past events more positively than they had actually rated them when the event occurred.

* Stereotyping — expecting a member of a group to have certain characteristics without having actual information about that individual.

* Subadditivity effect — the tendency to judge probability of the whole to be less than the probabilities of the parts.

* Subjective validation - perception that something is true if a subject's belief demands it to be true. Also assigns perceived connections between coincidences.

* Telescoping effect — the effect that recent events appear to have occurred more remotely and remote events appear to have occurred more recently.

* Texas sharpshooter fallacy — the fallacy of selecting or adjusting a hypothesis after the data is collected, making it impossible to test the hypothesis fairly.

Social biases

Most of these biases are labeled as attributional biases.

* Actor-observer bias — the tendency for explanations of other individuals' behaviors to overemphasize the influence of their personality and underemphasize the influence of their situation (see also fundamental attribution error). However, this is coupled with the opposite tendency for the self in that explanations for our own behaviors overemphasize the influence of our situation and underemphasize the influence of our own personality.

* Dunning-Kruger effect — "...when people are incompetent in the strategies they adopt to achieve success and satisfaction, they suffer a dual burden: Not only do they reach erroneous conclusions and make unfortunate choices, but their incompetence robs them of the ability to realize it. Instead, ...they are left with the mistaken impression that they are doing just fine."[6](see also Lake Wobegon effect, and overconfidence effect).

* Egocentric bias — occurs when people claim more responsibility for themselves for the results of a joint action than an outside observer would.

* Forer effect (aka Barnum Effect) — the tendency to give high accuracy ratings to descriptions of their personality that supposedly are tailored specifically for them, but are in fact vague and general enough to apply to a wide range of people. For example, horoscopes.

* False consensus effect — the tendency for people to overestimate the degree to which others agree with them.

* Fundamental attribution error — the tendency for people to over-emphasize personality-based explanations for behaviors observed in others while under-emphasizing the role and power of situational influences on the same behavior (see also actor-observer bias, group attribution error, positivity effect, and negativity effect).

* Halo effect — the tendency for a person's positive or negative traits to "spill over" from one area of their personality to another in others' perceptions of them (see also physical attractiveness stereotype).

* Herd instinct — Common tendency to adopt the opinions and follow the behaviors of the majority to feel safer and to avoid conflict.

* Illusion of asymmetric insight — people perceive their knowledge of their peers to surpass their peers' knowledge of them.

* Illusion of transparency — people overestimate others' ability to know them, and they also overestimate their ability to know others.

* Ingroup bias — the tendency for people to give preferential treatment to others they perceive to be members of their own groups.

* Just-world phenomenon — the tendency for people to believe that the world is "just" and therefore people "get what they deserve."

* Lake Wobegon effect — the human tendency to report flattering beliefs about oneself and believe that one is above average (see also worse-than-average effect, and overconfidence effect).

* Notational bias — a form of cultural bias in which a notation induces the appearance of a nonexistent natural law.

* Outgroup homogeneity bias — individuals see members of their own group as being relatively more varied than members of other groups.

* Projection bias — the tendency to unconsciously assume that others share the same or similar thoughts, beliefs, values, or positions.

* Self-serving bias — the tendency to claim more responsibility for successes than failures. It may also manifest itself as a tendency for people to evaluate ambiguous information in a way beneficial to their interests (see also group-serving bias).

* Self-fulfilling prophecy — the tendency to engage in behaviors that elicit results which will (consciously or not) confirm our beliefs.

* System justification — the tendency to defend and bolster the status quo, i.e. existing social, economic, and political arrangements tend to be preferred, and alternatives disparaged sometimes even at the expense of individual and collective self-interest.

* Trait ascription bias — the tendency for people to view themselves as relatively variable in terms of personality, behavior and mood while viewing others as much more predictable.

Memory errors

Further information: Memory bias

* Beneffectance: perceiving oneself as responsible for desirable outcomes but not responsible for undesirable ones. (Term coined by Greenwald (1980))

* Consistency bias: incorrectly remembering one's past attitudes and behaviour as resembling present attitudes and behaviour.

* Cryptomnesia: a form of misattribution where a memory is mistaken for imagination.

* Egocentric bias: recalling the past in a self-serving manner, e.g. remembering one's exam grades as being better than they were, or remembering a caught fish as being bigger than it was

* False memory

* Hindsight bias: filtering memory of past events through present knowledge, so that those events look more predictable than they actually were; also known as the 'I-knew-it-all-along effect'.

* Suggestibility: a form of misattribution where ideas suggested by a questioner are mistaken for memory.

Common theoretical causes of some cognitive biases

* Attribution theory, especially:

o Salience

* Cognitive dissonance, and related:

o Impression management

o Self-perception theory

* Heuristics, including:

o Availability heuristic

o Representativeness heuristic

* Adaptive Bias

See? Our minds are powerful to destroy us. Why can’t we use its power to bring us prosperity, growth, and happiness instead of destruction? I keep on asking this on myself. We feel more whole the more we are trying to bleed ourselves.

A Celebration of Gratefulness and Thankfulness

2008-01-05T02:15:00.000-08:00

It’s my 24^th year of my existence, a day when God gave life on my human flesh. I promised to myself that I will be happy no matter what happen. And I will ask nothing but t be more grateful and thankful for the thousands of blessings I have received and continuously receiving until now. God is so good! I never expected of countless greetings I received today its enough for me that they remember my special day. It’s enough for me to realize that I am truly blessed and loved by God. I am overwhelmed with this happiness it is outpouring the space of my heart. I wanted to cry because I cannot contain this joy. It badly needs to be shared. I need to tell those people who have touched my life in so many ways. I know, I owe it to them. They need to know it. But most of all, I wanted to let God know how I deeply value the gift of life He has given to me. I may run out of words to express the kind of gratefulness I am feeling right now but never will I forget it made a significant impact on my life. I know at this very moment, my life will never be the same.

I want to return these blessings. I’m asking my Lord what does He want me to do for Him? I can’t answer that right away. He will reveal it to me through His words in scriptures, through people that I deal with everyday, or through my daily experience.

Now this is the start to discern in connection with this wonderful celebration.

The Significant Things I Have Learned This 2007

2007-12-26T18:41:00.000-08:00

My life would be empty if I know I didn’t learn on a life that I have lived this year. I am asking for more. I am not yet satisfied. But I need to practice right now of having the positive attitude: seeing the life hall full rather than half empty..

So here are the top Five significant things I have learned this year:

1. The best thing that you can do to your friend is not to give yourself, not to give a shoulder in times of despair, not to give them support when they need it, but to let go of them when you think they need to grow.

-In this year, three of my significant left me to explore the other places. My friend Con and Nikki are now in Manila. My friend Jane is now living in Canada for good. Her family left the Phils last July. And now, another new friend is about to leave to stay with her family in Manila. I will be sad. It will cost me tears and pain. But just like scars caused by this hurt of leaving, our friendship that we have is hard to destroy by distance. My friends, no matter how far they are will always have a soft spot in my heart.

-When I get to hear them after long months of not getting in touch with one another, it makes me happy knowing that they are becoming a better person. I know my friends deserve to receive the blessings God has showered for them. And I cannot provide it for them alone.

2.) Happiness will not come if you will just wait for it. Happiness is in you when you choose it. Choose happiness. In order to choose it, you need three things: the power to shift your perspective into a positive one, love for yourself, and inner peace.

-It’s inevitable we are having a bad hair day. If you still choose to be happy despite that you are having a shitty day, it will save you from the hours of frustration. You can’t simply choose. Look for something that will make you happy. If things are not going well, you just have to ask, what can I gain/learn from this? By changing your perspective, you will loose if you choose to loose, rather, you will gain more.

-Love yourself first and happiness will come naturally. You don’t need people to make you happy. Because even if you have them, you will still feel a huge void of emptiness and dissatisfaction if you don’t love yourself.

-Happiness starts from a heart that feels nothing but abundant joy, love, and peace. A heart where hate and grudge has no space for it. Let go of hate. Forgive often, and you will find the inner peace that will give you the happiness you can never imagine existed.

3.) Faith and Hope co-exist. Faith without hope is useless. Hope without faith brings uncertainty, doubt, and confusion. Hope strengthens faith. Faith justifies hope.

-Faith springs from the longing of the soul and so is hope. Hope allows us to enter on the world of the impossible, and make it real.

-Who says faith and doubt are opposite? Doubt is the element of faith. When you are hearing a bad gossip about someone you know? Do you usually believe the ones who tell you the gossip immediately or doubt if he or she is telling the truth? When you have faith on person, you always have reservation ..oh he may be like this or like that..he’s not like that before..maybe he is… When you have faith on someone, he is the only truth for you. You postpone your judgment unless you hear him speak.

-Hope is believing. Hope is overstepping on the realm of the unknown. Hope and expectation are different. When you expect, you push to see the outcome. Hope believes more than what is visible. Expectation springs from mind while hope gathers strength from the heart.

4.) You want to spend money with while feeling significant? Spend it with people you really love or someone that is so special for you and the outcome and result are more rewarding that what you expected. If you are to spend on the less essential stuff, make sure you share it with someone who shares the same interest with you.

-I know I am not the only one in this world who feels like this. For most of the breadwinners like me, we sometimes complain, thinking that we don’t have much left for us. We work and a big portion of our salary goes to our family. Sometimes, it is hard to buy expensive clothes thinking that it can still add up for you family expenses. But I realize I don’t have to worry. I am not earning that big, I don’t usually buy grand clothes every time I receive my salary, but I am still happy knowing that I helped them. Buying pasalubong to my family brings us closer together.

-I love bands and I love to but their CDs. But I don’t have a player. So I let my brother use it and so his old time friend. When I went home, that’s our bonding time, listening to the music only the two of us can appreciate.

5.) For the book readers, don’t just read. Don’t just memorize what you’ve read. Don’t just store it inside you brain. Learn from the books. Share it or discuss it with somebody. And most of all, transform it to the fabrics of your life. Yeah! You heard it right! Use what you’ve learned and practice it on your daily life.

-I have read so many books. And so far, there are so many things that I’ve learned from them. And most of their theories, I have already concretized it on my own life. I choose to share it with you. I hope you learn something from it. Most popular authors that influence me a lot are Stephen Covey, John Maxwell, Jonathan Kellerman, Ayn Rand, Ron Jenson, Deepak Chopra, Kahlil Gibran, and philosophers such as Plato, Aristotle, Friedrich Hegel, Soren Kierkegaard, St. Thomas Aquinas and a whole lot more.

And this learning is just a few. But hence, a proof that I am applying what I read on my practical living and finally share it with you.

i choose to be happy!!!woohooo!!!

2007-12-13T17:58:00.000-08:00

I don’t know how to start my day without writing. I don’t know..i just want to release this..I don’t know if I pity myself .. I don’t know if im angry.. I don’t wanna blame anyone except myself for feeling like hell once again… One thing I know for sure is I don’t want to start my day with gloomy mood like this or it will just ruin the rest fo my day..

Wow! How can I be so cruel to myself again when I just read a book about being happy.. But first, I wanna thank God for this wonderful day.. for giving me another chance to fell how much He loves me and how much he want me to enjoy the kind of life that He prepared for me today… Whatever happens, I wanna thank Him for this brand new day..I praise Him and thank Him for the life that I have….

I think its about ll the power to choose.. I nid to choose to be happy…by shifting my paradigm to a positive perspective.. for me it really takes a challenge..

Im suppose to hate a guy..but my heart refuse to..why is that??I am not like this…!!my old self will feel this.. but I don’t want to take care of this hate inside my heart for it will only poison my soul..well, the miracle of faith..you will never know how faith works until you experience it…

Im happy today..listening to the song Your Guardian Angel by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus..Am I looking for someone to be my angel that will sing this song for me? Or I want to be an angel for someone? I don’t know but I know this was dictated by my subconscious and unconscious…

I will never let you fall, ill stand up with you forever…ill be there for you through it all..even when saving you sends me to heaven…

How cute!!Well thanks for this song for it makes me strong in spite that I am experiencing emotional disturbance…hmm,, well well well!!!I guess I just want to enjoy my life today.. nobody wants to be lonely..hahahaha!!who wants to be lonely? Certainly nobody unless you choose to be..no way highway!! I am soo tired of crying for guys who are not worthy of my tears..

Yeah I think I have to recognize that I am hurt..but that’s how life is gonna shove us if we choose to..its the hardball of life but I nid to keep on moving..keep living..and kip believing in love!! It’s the only way for you to gain true inner peace within yourself…

a WOndERfuL sOLemN vIsIT

2007-12-06T17:19:00.000-08:00

Wew!Im not in good mood to write today but my why is my fingers are urging to touc the keyboard.. I guess this bloody mind has something to say again…Go ahead..I’m not able to read the book because I just had an important date with the Lord last night…But I guess that won’t stop me from having another non sense entry on this blog.. Shall I post it??

I think I just have to choose to be happy.. Why not? My boarding haws becomes an essential part of my spirituality now.. not just a place to rest, sleep, and live while I’m hir in Legaspi… Last night, my roommate and I become the host of Bible study. We regularly meet at Dunkin Donuts. But I guess things need to change a bit.. We need to look for more conducive place to worship Him..

Oh my gosh! I can’t believe how happy I am because my room is organized for a couple of days now. wow!! Unbelievable..!!! I always see to it that my room is clean and all is well before I leave it. That’s why when we are anticipating visitors; it wasn’t hard for me to prepare our room for solemn worship. My Lord is about to come to our house, it needs to be special!!! So I clean the room again, scrub the floor, put a white cloth on it and keep the things on its proper places.

But I have to confess that I am thinking of the grup first.. Not really the visiting of the Lord.. I am thinking if they will be comfortable.. I am first and foremost considering the conduciveness and the warmth of the room so everything goes very well during the study..Although its not that bad..but He must come first..Did He like it?How I accepted these pipol to worship Him? Oh my!Forgive me Lord God..But I still have vigil candles left I bought last Holy week.. So I ignite the three little candles and put them on a cute blue sky plate to make them more attractive..

Can I make up to yah Lord? I’ll do it better next time…I’ll do it for you and the group will just be my secondary goal next to you.

Before I end this blog, I need to say this to You Jesus, my Savior, thank you for coming into my life when I choose to accept You.. Thank You for sharing Your precious time with us.. I thank You from the bottom of my heart.. And right now, I wanna thank you for visiting our simple room. It’s so simple. We don’t have grand possessions to welcome you..Only our warmth and sincerity to welcome You is all we have..Only Thank You so much my Dear Lord..just don’t make me cry at this very moment plssss….You just don’t know how much You make me happy.. I am sooooo very blessed in thousands ways I could never imagine..I feel I don’t have the right to deserve You..But I am wholeheartedly overwhelmed by Your love my Lord.. Oh how I miss You..Oh how I miss the solemn nights..It was a couple of years ago…Thank You my Lord for visiting us.. Hope to meet You again next week.

The Bondage Breaker Insights Continues…

2007-12-05T21:28:00.000-08:00

I’m moving on to the chapter two of the Bondage Breaker by Neil Anderson entitled Finding Your Way to the World. This chapter talks about the presernce of spiritual dark forces existing on this earth. I am not forcing anyone to belive nor I am hir to convince you of their reality. Whether you accept it or not, these dark spiritual forces keep on lurking on our world.

We are alive in flesh and we have spirits. So as these dark creatures. They have spirits, they don’t have flesh but they have the power to hurt us without knowing it. If we try to live on the extreme, we are in deep trouble. One pole is living on a two tier world and living in the excluded middle. Both of them are trying to exclude or ignore the presence of these spirits on our material world. The opposite extreme is trying to be spiritual without the presence of God. This includes the New Age Movement, mysticism, chants, sorcerers, parapsychology, and numerous cults. If we try to live spiritual without God, this is the easiest path to ignore His presence, and worse, you are leading to worship Satan. But you need not be afraid for there are ways to combat them and win the battle by God’s will.

The author identifies 6 ways:

1.) denying yourself: denying oneself is denying self-rule..this means that you try giving up the desire to be God. We can be God-like but we can never be god no matter how hard we try…it entail a complete dependence of God so you may function according to how God designed you to be..this is one of vitals of spiritual

2.) pick up your cross daily: it doesn’t mean that you have to suffer. It is carrying the Christ’s cross, not your own. It means that we acknowledge that we belong to God. Carrying the Christ’s cross is affirming that our identity is based from our relationship with God.

“I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the son of God, who loved and gave Himself up for me” (Galatians 2:20)

3.) Follow Christ: this is to follow Christ in everything that we do..by His will and by asking His guidance, we can follow him little by little although this journey is not easy.

4.) Sacrifice the lower life to gain the higher life: our modern world focus on the material things. We nid to give up the desire to get all of them. Seek things that God wants you to have. the things that you will need fro eternal life

5.) Sacrifice the pleasure of things to gain the pleasures of life: use things and zero in on caring pipol, not care with your possessions and use pipol for your own greedy interest. Can you trade you title, power, position, wealth and fame in exchange of enduring love, patience, health, peace, happiness and so on?

6.) Sacrifice the temporal to gain the eternal: this is giving up the tings that are tangible, the things that are temporary for they are so easy to vanish.. focus cultivating enduring and long lasting values that will guarantee us an eternal life..

These ways many not be easy. There is no even shortcut. Through this challenging journey, we are inviting the courage, perseverance and commitment to stand amidst all consequences that might threaten us not to pursue them. You can start this little by little and by believing on yourself.

The Bondage Breaker

2007-12-04T20:42:00.000-08:00

I am currently reading the book by Neil Anderson entitled The Bondage Breaker. The book generally talks about overcoming all the strong destructive elements that keeps on trapping us to habitual sins. Such factors would include strong bad habitual patterns, irrational thoughts and feelings, as well as the external forces brought by environment but most specially the dark forces.

There are several books that allows me to become more mature but I think this will be one of the most challenging and controversial book that I am about to read for I will be equipped with powerful tools to battle the evil forces.. Yeah, the evil ones.. I started the very first chapter and something bad happens. Well I am not insinuating that the Bondage Breaker has a curse. This book serves as an offensive move. Last night, I dreamed of two snakes. I used to drim snakes but now they bite me. I know this is not going to be easy. But I remember my frend said to me. This is the only way to win d battle, to meet them on the eye. Not to keep on running from them.

This book is not mine. I am borrowing it from my workmate but I loose my patience on try borrowing it again and again. Well, needless to say, I am bound to read this book even though my intention to borrow it simply fade away. But God is good. After few days, my workmate brought this Bondage Breaker book and got the chance to read it right after my work.

To begin sharing what I read from this book, well I am just starting but I feel the need to share it with others..

=let me share with you the common misconceptions about the bondage..these are the faulty ideas that keeps my fellow Christians in darkness

1. Demons were active when Christ was on earth, but their activity was subsided

2. What the early church called demonic activity we now understand is the mental illness

3. Some problems r psychological while some are spiritual

4. Christians cannot be affected by demons

5. Demonic influence is only evident in extreme or violent behavior and gross sin

6. Freedom from spiritual bondage is the result of the power encounter with demonic forces

According to the author of this book, we don’t need to defeat the demons because Christ has already did it for us when He died on the cross and resurrect on the third day. All we need to do is to believe that Jesus Christ is our true savior. Faith. Faith in belief and action. This is what we need.

flirting can save your day

2007-12-03T20:08:00.000-08:00

dont get me wrong..im a flirty gurl without any intention to harm other pipol, most especially the boys (eherm!)..but i realize that being flirt is not only giving you a good boost on yourself and the ones you're flirting with but you can use your flirting skills to save your suppose to be shitty day..i found this article so interesting so i add them up to support my realization..

Your daughter's teacher is annoyed: You forgot to send in a white T-shirt for tie-dye day, and she had to tie-dye a hankie.

Instead of offering up a lame apology, which'll just get the teacher angrier, inspire her protective instincts to your advantage. You know how you bat your eyelashes when you need a big, strapping fella to reach the paper towels on the top shelf of the supermarket? The same principle applies here. The difference is, you appeal to her emotions rather than her muscles. "Head things off by saying, 'Oh, please don't be too angry,'" says Lowndes. "Her instinctive reaction is to say 'Well, I'm not really angry,' so you won't feel too bad." What's also effective about this is once you've gotten her to say she's not that angry, her emotions will subconsciously follow her words, and she really won't be as irritated with you. Voila: you've made her feel powerful, then protective, then mellowed-out. Aren't you the clever little vixen!

You arrive at your car and see a traffic officer with her ticket-book ominously flipped open.

We know you'd like to rant and rave about the injustice of your missing the meter-change by a mere three minutes, but that's not going to get you anywhere. Instead, create an us-versus-them feeling between you and the officer. Start by using her name -- it's right there on her lapel -- in a friendly fashion, showing her you understand she's a hard-working human being, not a walking uniform. Say, "Officer Hanson, I know you're just doing your job, but I'm sure you know what it's like when the line at the Gap just won't move, right?" It's just like when you sit in a corner at a party with a cute guy, making fun of the other people to foster a little togetherness. Jolly her along, get her to laugh with you, and you might find yourself not owing $25 to the city.

You were supposed to have that report to your boss by noon, but you're just...not done.

You've got to go in there and face the music, and it sounds like it's going to be all bagpipes and accordions. One well-known flirt technique is mirroring -- subtly copying the actions, gestures, and body language of the person you're talking to. "It's known as neurolinguistic programming, and it's a tried-and-true seduction technique," says Lowndes. "Birds of a feather really do flock together -- we tend to like people who seem to resemble us; it makes us feel safe. So if you can make your boss feel friendly toward you, her attitude may soften." The key here is to be subtle. Don't play Mirror with her, scratching your nose with your right hand exactly when she does, like the old routine with Lucille Ball and Harpo Marx. Do it a moment later. And enhance the connection by keeping your posture like hers -- tall and straight if that's how she sits, floppy and exhausted if that's her style. You can even make your pace of speech like hers -- rapid and peppery, or slow and drawly.

Your ticket says "coach," but when you check in for your boarding pass, business class starts sounding awfully nice.

Just as when you're trying to hook your chosen guy-prey, flattery will get you everywhere. "Begin by complimenting the airline, the customer service, and the workers you've come across," says Lowndes. "Talk to that clerk as if you really see what it's like from his perspective. Put yourself in his shoes." Tell him how annoying the rush of people must be, comment on how many customers he's already handling, express his feelings for him, and he'll feel validated and loved. Of course, no amount of flattery will make a seat appear if the flight is overbooked, but the worst that can happen is you create a feeling of goodwill. And that might get you an extra bag of peanuts.

Your feet are killing you, but all the seats on this train have people in them.

There are certain combinations of flirt-tactics that, when used correctly, can almost always get you what you want. In this case, you want to combine the power of touch with eye contact and a friendly smile. Touch that seated man somewhere neutral -- the arm, the hand -- to get his attention and beat down the imaginary wall he's put up around himself (to create private space in a public place). "Just be careful not to startle him -- even a gentle touch is extremely powerful," says Lowndes. Once he looks up at you, don't take the victim-y, pout-y route -- it annoys people. Instead, give him a smile, even if it's a tired one, and explain that you're not feeling so great and would so appreciate it if he could let you sit down. Play it right and he'll be flattered that you chose him to ask, as the most generous and trustworthy-seeming fella on all of Amtrak. You sit down, he feels noble, and everyone's happy -- isn't that the way things should be?

TAKING A SIP OF COFFEE IN A MUG

2007-11-21T20:21:00.001-08:00

Oh my gosh!dnt let me go back on my torturous system..Oh my!! I don’t wanna go back there. I nid to start this..achive personal significance for the day despite of a gloomy day. I’m so thankful that I have a decent sleep last night. And I wanna thank God for that. Right now I feel sooo nervous..oh heck! Enough! I wanna be completely over with the things that kip on bugging me..

No way!!! I feel so incomplete again but no way!! I don’t wanna go back to that.. No way!! Whew!! Why is that everytime I am going to write I should be writing about him..hahahahaha!!! LOL!! I don’t want to suppress..well I guess I just wanna enjoy it.. But I think I nid to keep away from sumthing that will allow me to remember him more.. Oh how I wish those times..my kagagahan times..haha!!musta nmn un? I cant help but laugh at them most specially at myself.. And now, I don’t wanna deny that this nervousness kip on coming back on me when in fact we just chat yesterday..

Oh hell!! This means that sumthing is wrong w me… I don’t know how will I define it. Eerrrrr…or I think its d bagyo..haha..

But allow me to stick on my personal goal.. Its one of the destruction so I nid to eradicate it out of my system.

I don’t know why my mind is soooo tired yesterday.. Maybe because Im sooo tired of thinking…wew!! I can’t even enjoy because I was bothered by my anxiousness about the typhoon.. Somehow, I know d weather is affecting me. I don’t wanna write nor even post this nonsense entry but this is what’s happening to me right now… I feel so sleepy..

But wait! I remember from the book im reading, in every problem, there is an alternatives that you can choose to do you just have to identify the right move for yah..am I making sense now?? Hmmm. A little??? Better….

How about sipping my favorite coffee??? Why not? So il get back in a minute and lets see whats gonna happen next…

Wow!!Just imagining how my coffee tastes excites me..har har har!!wow!!! its really delicoois..now I feel better… wow!!i congratulate myself again for I am applying what Ive learned from the book Im reading..

When I fell bored early in d morning, sipping my fave coffee is d answer..hahaha..but what happen if coffee is not around?nahhh!!lets just think it when it really happens..haha…

Wow!!Sipping coffee is like sipping the joys of life inspite of our daily adversaries… Its sooo gloomy outside but this coffee helps me to get a little better… and the more you enjoy it, the more you appreciate it..my coffee is like that..d more I drink it the more it taste delicious.. everything that is ordinary can really make a difference it you learn to be a little more appreciative.. just like what im doing with my fave coffee..oh wow!! This is my first time to write about it..hahaha!!now this entry is now making sense..lol!!

Oh how I imagine Jesus Christ is with me.. we’re simply chatting.. or just share this simple coffee to enjoy the company of each other… what will I say to Him? He is not talking to me.. But He continuously sip His coffee but His eyes met mine and just smile.. Well I guess I just have to savor this moment being with me without necessarily talking. Is He doing the same thing???? I don’t want Him to go but I got tongue-tied. I just want to see Him… All of Him.. He knows whats inside my heart..

Now I see a child in me. Too hesitant to reach out to His father but her longing to be with Him is intense… I don’t know what to say… Im just sipping my coffee and just look at Him.. He didn’t say anything. He just look at me.. And say, “I am so near. I was just waiting for you to call me.. I’ve been waiting for you to call my name. Where have you been? Im missing you a lot. I am soo near yet you kip on running away from me.”

I don’t know what to say.. I don’t even know if this is just my imagination or there is sumthing that makes me imagine it.

But right now, I feel this inner peace.. I am not troubled nor bothered for I know that He’s with me…

A VICTIM OR A VICTOR? YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHOOSE

2007-11-21T00:04:00.000-08:00

Right now, I just wanna be in control..I just realize that I am so cruel to myself. Yeah I’ve been hurt by so many pipol and treated like a piece of crap and shit… I know I can’t easily move on.. But I don’t wanna get revenge with this hatred that I feel for them.. Sometimes, I realize that I can be so numb, never care what will they feel..Oh my!! I don’t wanna be a psychopath!!! I want this over and done…

Now I choose to be a victor and not a victim… I don’t want to let it happen again.. Now I will take charge of myself.. Oh how I wish I will not hold nor bear any stains of grudge against them..Wait a minute..one at a time first… I need to deal with my old pains.. I wanna move on.. I wanna put them aside for they are one of the obstacles that keep my away from achieving my personal significance. And I wanna start it right now at this gloomy day.. It’s a good start to at least stay away first on hurting pipol…

I remember the book I read, its about achieving healthy relationship with other pipol written by my fave author John Maxwell..hurt pipol are hurting pipol… I was hurt that is why I have the tendency to hurt too.. And vice versa.. But the good thing is, at least I am learning to see things from the perspective of other pipol.. Its also written on his book entitled Winning with People.. Woah!! I congratulate myself for I was able to inculcate this learning and transcend it to the fabrics of my life… Sometimes you really need to see it from the perspective of others..

Yes, I have to admit that I have the tendency to get even with them but I know it won’t work out.. There are pipol hum I wanna let them know how much they hurt me..But to others, I just prefer to stay away from them. I don’t wanna see them.. But Im working on my hate or enmity towards them.. I just wann forgive them and move on.. And finally thank them for hurting me because I know that I can learn sumthing from them that I may never realize yet.. But I sumhow owe it to them..

Jesus said to love your enemies.. He also said that wen they curse you, bless them.. Oh its darn hard..Im not here to talk about religions.. But what Jesus is saying is true and practical. It is only by loving and forgiving them you can find the authentic inner peace. What is then the reward if you will only love your frends and those hu love you? Makes sense? Hmmm..well I am not hir to really discuss the teaching of the Bible but Jesus Christ is right after all…I have to love them..But I have to admit its tooooooooooooooo damn haaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrdddddddd…aaarrrrrrrggghhhhh!!!!!its like saying NO WAY HIGHWAY!!!!!!!

But it’s the only way…To make it easier, just do it for yourself first and not for them..After all this is the very first rison why you will do it.. You need to erase all the negative emotional baggage that will hamper you to achieve what you want. HATE for OTHER will only poison you soul, you personality, including your overall perspective about the world..

NOW STOP!!!I don’t want to entertain them…. And I can do it!! Yeah!!!

For the meantime, I wanna take charge of myself.. I wanna heal..But healing should start on your desire to be healed, to move on, and to forgive others to start your new life and to live life that was meant for you..

I am now in control.. I wanna take charge.. I don’t wanna blame different persons for what I am and for what I cannot do.. I don’t wanna be a victim..

Right now, I am claiming that this VICTORY IS MINE THIS TIME BY GOD’S WILL…This is what I choose.. This is the freedom God has given to me and I need to be a responsible steward of this freedom He has give to me……

tHe aTTiTuDE oF gRaTiTuDe

2007-11-06T17:04:00.000-08:00

Argh!!what the hell is happening to me? I realize how ungrateful I am on my life that I lead.. for the past few weeks I was consumed by hatred to all those people who treats me like shit and piece of crap… what can I do? I didn’t exist to please them.. please HATE, GO AWAY!!! I don’t want you to poison my soul.. the more I hate them, the more I make myself miserable with their bullshits.. I wanted to move on but its not working out.. Lord God please help me forgive them.. I wanted to live a new life.. Please don’t take it away from me..

I wanna be alone.. I don’t wanna hide.. Its just I want to spend time alone..i will not analyze yet.i will stop thinking first..i just want to have a decent rest and sleep..and peace of mind, not piece of mind..hehe..

I know no matter how tough the life is, I should never fail to realize that I am blessed enough with more than I deserve. Despite of the pain that I feel, I know I have more than a million of reasons to be thankful that I am living a meaningful life.. It’s a matter of accepting that life is full of surprises in so many forms.. Its all up to you how r you gonna handle them creatively…

I refuse to welcome this HATE..GO AWAY!!!!! I was greatly stunned with the book that im reading, Make a Life, Not Just a Living.. In everyday life experience, we need to develop the attitude of gratitude.. problems make us tough and creative.. problems teaches us life lessons.. our hurts and troubles helps us how to be humble.. my pain teaches me to be more concern and caring.. my old hurts teaches me to reach out to others more than thinking about myself… being grateful allows me to appreciate the beauty of the life that im living.. im the only one hu has the right to live this by God’ will and plan..

WHEW!!! I can’t believe im breathing again the beauty of my life..its not perfect, its not full of happiness, but I have all the power and creativity to make it worth living in every seconds.. Im soooo grateful that there are people who love me, keep on loving me, and still love me no matter what.. Im soooo grateful that I have a magnificent and great God that incredibly designed it for me.

Not bad!!! I may have hurts.. I may be troubled.. but that won’t stop me from being HAPPY because I know God wants me to be.. thanks for this trouble because it helps me to seek more God..

oh that’s tough!!! It’s the ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE

untitled

2007-10-02T18:08:00.000-07:00

Its been a long time that I wasn’t able to write on my friggin blogspot.. im hurtin yesterday… I guess this is what you will feel wen someone special for you has the other someone… im not suppose to feel this way and I don’t have the right to feel this..Brendan’s not my bf..im not his gurl though he used to call me “my gurl” bullshit. I guess its just an endearment or he really mean it..he claimed me as one of his gf..oh fuck!!whatever it is, I really don’t give a piece of shit!!! Well I guess this is the time wen I really just want to keep him as a frend or totally get him out of my friggin system..But I have to admit that in a short span of time he really change my world.. I sumhow owe it to him.. But I don’t want to expect or else il be damned frustrating myself..

I know that im jealous knowing that he has so many gfs, bimbos..oh whatever!!! I think im one of those.. but right now I really don’t give a fucking damn… I don’t have the right to feel this but this is how I feel.. that means that I really fell in love with him.. and its damn hurting.. but at least I was wide awake that he can never be mine not even in a million years.. someone’s better deserves my love more than him… how can I be so daydreamer..no its more than that!! What’s the English term of “ilusyunada”? yeah I felt sumhow like that and I really felt so ashamed… huwaaaaaa….. I don’t know if its my dignity as a woman that stands out that time or pride or my will to really get over with him… he has other priority..its the other gurl that he chats and he replies w me late? Now how about that?

Its indirectly saying that im just one of those that belongs to his least priority.. maybe not like that.. its just that there is some other woman in his life.. im happy for them that they get along very well but im hurting for myself..oh my!! Im soooo hurting..its painful.. he tells me that he is busy..yeah its true..busy chatting with other woman.. I don’t have the right to question him so I just say goodbye to him and haul my ass on work… well at least I have the last ditch of effort to keep my self-preservation..

I think that’s one way of letting go of him… so I give way not to disturb them..i don’t wanna be an intruder.. besides, I deserve a man better than him.. and I think though it hurts a lot, Brendan and that gurl really looks perfect for each other in every way.. the gurl belongs to his own race, with a blood of a countess or a princess, and belongs to the higher society ranks.. more than this, I think she is a model, a cover gurl to be exact..

Well, Im still thankful to get this courage to leave him earlier and focus on my work.. its soooo unfair waiting for him damn message to come wen I know he is just busy chatting with other gurls.. im just the last priority..well I will never allow that..besides he is just my online frend.. well I guess im not really that broken.. at least he is not totally out of reach.. I was just thankful because somehow I was gaining back my concentration at work.. I really need to do this..i love my work so much and I wasn’t about to neglect this because of him…but I really have to deal with this pain..im still hurting..i can’t help but cry.. oh God! I wanna cry.. You know every well that I was toooo hurting… it’s still painful… I just want this over and done… just give me the courage to stand up and moved on..

Well at least..im starting to move on though im still hurt.. now that I’ve admitted that I really unexpectedly fall in live with him.. it needs to be NOW!!!! So I need now to go back to work…

i feel so darn pretty today

2007-09-21T00:18:00.000-07:00

well, im in good mood to write now..im just enjoying the level of freedom that i have right now.. i felt so D-A-M-N PRETTY!!... i guess wen u allow yourself to feel that you're ugly and you keep on comparing yourself with others, you will be disappointed..

i guess i just really need a self search wen i always do this.. i always think and analzye.. i guess i just need to savor this moment..

i dont know why i felt so damn pretty..haha!! after d destructions, the ups and downs.. well i guess these negative elements don't have a place here in my column.. i just realize that wen you are someone, a woman of darn substance, no man will ever forget you no matter how bastard or son-0f-a-bitch he is... how much if man learns how to appreciate a woman.. well, i guess i really need to experience the feeling of being ugly so that i will appreciate myslef more..

mwah!!i felt so darn cute!!hihihi!! not physically, but emotionally.. sometimes its really your emotions that will really put you in deep shit!

before you can love a man, you need to love youself, first as a woman, you'll be admired naturally.. it will truly show....you really dont need to be admired though but they will, naturally... just stay sweet, simple and confident..

woman, u're more than just your pair of tits, an adorable pussy to lust and drool over, more than just a pretty creation in a facade of makeups and lipsticks..
you are more than that.. you deserve to be respected, lover, admired, and adored,
because you're a woman that you are..

show the real you as a woman, your confidence, sweetness, and of course your sweet smile..
it can really lift up a downhearted soul...

so woman, keep shinin' and stay naturally beautiful as you are always!!!

resend or let me love you one day at a time

2007-09-19T17:57:00.000-07:00